May is almost gone and this month has been something else. The experiences have been like never before. I’ve grown so much this month, I’ve learnt a lot. I will tell you all about May 2018 in another post.
First of all, I must give props to Britain's Royal Family for planning such an elegant wedding (I think I enjoyed this one, more than William’s own). The New Duchess of Sussex looked beautiful, happy and they both looked so in-love. I wish them the best and hoping twins for the couple! (All-day Saturday May 19, I was tuned to CNN from 7:30am watching every single bit, you’d think they paid me not to dare miss a moment. But what can I say? I love Love).
Now, on to today’s thought;
THE FORGOTTEN
‘The Forgotten’ is the person who is standing by the large glass window, looking out, at the rest of the world zooming and zapping by, while he/she stares on for hours. It’s not because he/she wants to be standing there but because he/she feels held back, stuck, no opportunity, nowhere to go.
‘The Forgotten’ is the person scrolling through dozens of Instagram and Facebook pictures, reading twitter posts and seeing other people ‘enjoying their lives’. It seems the world has moved on, people are having fun, but in the space of all that joy, change and positive outcomes for others, he/she has been left behind or left out. No hope for a brighter tomorrow. Yeah? NO! SNAP OUT OF IT!
Let me warn you, ‘The Forgotten’ is a mindset, an emotional state of being, a feeling that continues to wrap itself around one’s mind until it becomes an entity and a Principality all on its own.
WHEN YOU THINK YOU ARE FORGOTTEN
You know that feeling you get when the rest of the world is moving on and forward, breaking strides, achieving milestones but you are still stuck on the same spot you’ve been in for years, nothing much to talk about as regards progress in your life. You know what I mean? Yeah, I know you do.
I’ve been there. I’m sure many of you have been also. It’s a very bitter place to be. It’s a place where you wonder ‘Who you offended in this life’ that has refused to ‘let you go’. (Where you begin to wonder which one of your ‘village people’ is strongly behind this)
Unfortunately, I don’t have the perfect solution to fix this mindset. If I did, I would bottle it up, package it neatly and sell to the world. I would be an instant zillionaire, I know MANY PEOPLE need this. Especially in this crazy 21st Century reality.
But what I’ve found that works in times like this (and I hope and pray it works for you if you’re currently struggling with this mindset) is this;
- Stop thinking about all of it alone. It’s too much of a burden to bear on your own. Go find someone, people you can earnestly talk to; no sugar-coating of details, it’s not a press interview, it’s you baring your heart to someone. It helps to talk about it. Trust me on this, I KNOW. And if you don’t have anyone to talk to about what you’re going through, talk to me. I’m not just saying that to be politically correct, I mean it. I won’t judge you, I will listen to you, be the friend you need and the both of us will find a way to work through it all. Here’s my email; ronke.gbede@gmail.com.
- Stop selling yourself short. You are more than you think you are, even if it doesn’t look like it at the moment. You are more beautiful than you give yourself credit for. You are an amazing, intelligent being. You are not as fat as you think you are (Stop glaring at yourself in the mirror!). You are not as thin as you think (stop grimacing over your shape!). You are so much more than the negative words and comments you’ve been paying attention to. You are a complete and whole person. You are someone’s type, someone’s leader, someone’s desired wife/husband, someone’s precious best friend, someone’s mother/father, an inventor, a problem-solver. I’m not psyching you up, I’m telling you who you are. So stop trying to fit into the world’s view of ‘Perfect’ or ‘normal’. No great person (and you can google as many of them in history) was ever considered perfect or normal. You belong to the league of Extra-ordinary People!
- Get rid of the unnecessary, poisonous people around you. Move away from what you don’t want. It’s not by force to have 20 friends who slay together, but don’t know how to pray together or to hold one another up in times of crisis. You can’t be the friend everyone wants when things are going great, but everyone avoids you when you are down and going through emotional roller-coasters. You need to wean yourself of this life-style. If it’s presently impossible to physically move away, for one genuine reason or the other, then move away in your mind. Find a ‘Safe Place’. A Safe Place can be someone positive to reach out to, someone you can be real with, that you can talk to, that you know will always have your back. Or it can be something you do, a talent you have that takes your mind off what is currently going on around you and soaks you into something else, an escape; for example; drawing, singing, writing, even volunteer work. For me, I prefer the former; talking to someone. Getting to blow off steam by talking HELPS A WHOLE LOT. I pray you have someone in your life you can reach out to like this. If you don’t, my offer still stands. You have my email address now.
- BREATHE. IN. OUT. IN. OUT. JUST BREATHE. It’s not as bad as you think. You are the only one that has the power to give up completely. Nothing can pull you down totally except you let it. Don’t shut the door on hope. Don’t be overwhelmed by helplessness. God hasn’t forgotten you. He hasn’t forgotten all your prayers, fasting, groaning. This isn’t the end of it all. There’s something spectacular for you. It’s been cooking and you’re about to get served.
Stay Strong My Dear, Keep your head up.
Have a blessed week Darlings!
